My frustration with Plastic Surgeons!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As of now, I have two appointments made with the only plastic surgeons I could find who will accept insurance as a form of payment, (but these will most likely be canceled now, and my search put on hold till next summer) but they are not until August. One is early-August (5th), the other @ the end (29th). One doctor supposedly is scheduling surgeries for a few weeks after the consultation (29th); the other is booked till next year (5th). I’m not sure if I will stay in town that long to make them or not, because I don’t want to miss Natalie’s first day of kindergarten on the 29th, and I have to get her home and back to a regular schedule. I am thinking I am going to go home the weekend of July 15th; July 15th is Ruben’s birthday. But Ruben just came to me (7/5/05) and said that won’t work he has to work that week, I think he has inventory to do or something. So I might stay till the first week of August and make it to my August 5th PS appointment, then go home after that…..that way she’ll have at least a few weeks to settle down before school. I am really getting homesick, but I also would like to get my breast reconstructed and every other plastic surgeon I called refused to accept any type of insurance as a form of payment; they only accept cash or credit’ no exceptions! I can’t afford to pay that kind of cash up-front, or take out a loan until the insurance company would pay me back. I don’t even think I would qualify for a loan, I don’t work! Now you can see why I am so frustrated and stressed? If I had hair, I’m sure I would have pulled it out by now!