July 29, 2005 – Finally relief at last, until no-one shows up to say good-bye.

I finally met with a doctor today to talk about my depression, anxiety, and stress – and unlike the assessment person I spoke with over at Montevista Hospital, he was not judgmental at all. Instead he changed my anxiety medication, and advised me to follow up with someone in Elko once I get home. Then we went off to my next appointment. Luckily I showed up like an hour early for it, because the paperwork I had to fill out was unbelievable! I had to fill out one of those scan-tron test that was 4 pages long, front & back! I was at this appointment for over 3 hours, but he turned out to be the most amazing doctors I’ve seen. He was the pain management doctor. I didn’t notice it, but my husband said he was this big, burly man, and he must have been, because he picked me up and snapped me like a twig. He just twisted me and bended me and yanked me, and my whole neck and back cracked. If that wasn’t scary enough, he then gave me 3 shots in my back of what he called vitamins. Of course there were no shots, or cracking for the other parts of my body that hurt, but he did give me better pain meds. I left there feeling incredibly better, for once in weeks my back hadn’t hurt. So since I was feeling so much better, both physically, and not as much mentally stressed as I had been, we headed over to PT’s where I had made plans to have a good-bye party with my old co-workers. I sent out an email the week before, had heard back from several people, yet once we got there NO ONE SHOWED. I think if Ruben hadn’t been there, it would have been enough to send me back to the edge – but instead, I said screw it and had a nice dinner there with my hubby while we both tried to have a nice relaxing Friday evening. Maybe it’s better no one showed up.