July 13, 2005 – You know you’re old when….

It's sad when your mother sends you email that not only can you fully relate to, but actually describes you! I think I really have kept 26 doctors employed this year alone!
All I want to know is when did 31 become such an old age, was it just when I turned it, or was it always this way - or worse yet, is it all in my head? LOL.
I liked it so much I had to add it to my blog today to share. Have a good laugh – I did, but I really hope this isn't on the kindergarten curriculum this year!

The New Alphabet
A is for Apple, and B is for Boat, That used to be right, But now it won't float !
Age before Beauty is what we once said, But let's be a bit more realistic instead:
Now A's for arthritis;
B's the bad back,
C's the chest pains, perhaps cardiac?
D's for dental decay and decline,
E's for eyesight, can't read that top line!
F's for fissures and fluid retention,
G's for gas which I'd rather not mention.
H's high blood pressure--I'd rather it low;
I for incisions with scars you can show.
J's for joints, out of socket, won't mend,
K's for knees that crack when they bend.
L's for libido, what happened to sex?
M's for memory, I forget ! what comes next
N's neuralgia, in nerves way down low;
O's for osteo, the bones that don't grow!
P's for prescription's, I have quite a few, just give me a pill and I'll be good as new!
Q's for queasy, is it fatal or flu?
R for reflux, one meal turns to two.
S for sleepless nights, counting my fears,
T's for Tinnitus; there's bells in my ears!
U's for urinary; big troubles with flow;
V's for vertigo, that's "dizzy," you know.
W's for worry, NOW what's going 'round?
X's for X ray, and what might be found.
Y's another year I'm left here behind,
Z's for zest that I still have-- in my mind.
I've survived all the symptoms, my body's deployed, And I've kept twenty-six doctors employed!!!