As Spring Break draws to an end....

It's back to school on Monday (thank God!). But during this week away, I feel as though I barely accomplished anything. I made a few cards, and I'm working on a swap that I need to mail out tomorrow. Yes I know, I'm a procrastinator, it's just there's been so much going on in my life, most days it's impossible for me to get up before noon. I don't know, maybe it's because I just haven't adjusted yet to the new meds they switched me to, or maybe I'm still trying to make up for staying up till 4 am for those 4 days the week before last. I don't know. All I know is today for once I am happy, happy that my husband made it home safe last night - safe and soundly from his trip to Montana that he drove to and from. And unfortunately it snowed during his trip and he drove through the Rocky Mountains both ways. I'm also happy that after nearly 4 days we finally have TV again because after snowing here too, I somehow knocked the Dish Network receiver out of place, but luckily, my husband fixed it better than ever and I have TV just in time to watch The Sopranos, Big Love, & Grey's Anatomy on Sunday. I paniced at the thought of missing those shows, especially now that Tony just woke up from his coma, and I am still holding out for Dr. McDreamy to leave his cheating wife and go back to Meredith Grey. Big Love has me intrigued as you never know, living up here, 3 1/2 hours away from Salt Lake, I could be surrounded my Mormoms/Polygamists and I'm curious by their lifestyle - not that I would EVER join, just curious, besides, it is a funny show. C'mon you can admit it, a man with 3 wives is funny. I'd feel sorry if my husband had 3 of me. He'd probably shoot himself and me for that matter! But I'm so glad to have my TV and DVR back, cause yes, I am a TV junkie! As it is I have already missed so many shows, I can forget about this season of AI cause I'll never catch up now! But I miss Medium, Las Vegas, ans CSI!!!! So for the last few days I spent my time re-watching the 1st season of Grey's Anatomy on DVD. Dr. McDreamy is so hot! It's funny, I never saw the first episode of that show and you see his naked butt, even hotter. I never thought Patrick Dempsey and the word hot would be coming out of my mouth, but it is. He has done a lot of growing and maturing since his WooWoo Kid days, and Can't Buy Me Love. He is definately something sexy to look at now and not some awkard looking kid! I definately suggest you all watch, at least once and see for yourself if your not hooked. It's like ER meets Sex in the City. It comes on ABC. Up here we are on Utah time so we get it an hour earlier than the reast of you, but check your listings. I even managed to get my hubby addicted to it.
Anyway, I've got another card to make and this swap to finish, but below is the card I finished the other day using my Quickutz die cutter and ribbon by MM Cosmo Pink/Brown and some MM Pink Staples. the pattered paper is made by PC. Inside in pink carstock in skinnimini Katie font in upper and lower case it reads: You're so Sweet!

















Till next time enjoy and be good!

Beautiful Card for an ugly week

Last week I got in the mail a handmade card from Cynthia. It was a beatuiful thank you for a small little book I sent her to bring her laughter and joy. Let me just say that her wonderful card made my day! Every since getting back from Vegas I have suffered insomnia something terrible and for about 4 days straight I stayed up until 4am. This left me very tired, not to mention the cold I had, and complete acne chaos going on after the stressful visits with my doctors and seeing my mom in the hospital. Because of all this I ran a little late one day getting Natalie to school. Instead of the teacher asking me why I was late, my daughter told her when asked that "my mommmy takes lots of pills". While that is partly true, a kindergarten teacher should know better than to take a 6 year olds word for complete honesty. Not to mention the fact that she has no idea what I take or when. I never heard of any of it till days after the fact, and was never asked to explain or anything. Then one day I ran a few minutes late to pick her up. I thought nothing of this because I had an arrangement with another mom, who told me that she would stay with Natalie anytime I was running late. Problem was, when I arrived at the school neither Natalie, or Tracy were anywhere to be found. I sat there wondering what to do, wondering if she somehow manage to sneek her way onto a bus, as I've often noticed the teacher not paying attention to who needs to get on the bus and who doesn't. So I sat and waited. I figured the buses would be back shortly, and I knew that if you weren't at the bus stop to meet your child, the driver would bring them back to school. So after about 20 minutes I get this call from the school asking where I am, saying that they have Natalie in the office. I told the lady calling that I had been sitting in the parking lot looking for her for the last 20+ minutes. The principal and teacher brought her out to me, but said they couldn't release her to me in my condition? I asked what condition that was, because other than being sick and tired I was fine. I hadn't taken any pain pills that morning, just some cold medicine. The principal went on to say how I looked as though I couldn't manipulate a vehicle, yet she didn't see me pull into the parking lot (and yes, I was parked straight!), so how would she know? She told me that there were other days that week that I had sat in my car for long periods of time after droppping her off or picking her up, and it looked like I was struggling, but if anyone had come closer they would have actually seen me sitting there, as I often do and talk on the phone- better that than drive and talk, right? Well they must have really thought I was doped up or something because they refused to release her to my custody, and called my husband. They also proceeded to call Child Protective Services on me. At the present time I cannot be home alone with my child or drive my vehicle. Ruben had to bring his little brother up here from Vegas to babysit us both. Not to mention he also took away my pain medication that is prescribed to me to take every 8 hours, and only administors half a pill a night to me. He doesn't beleive that I USUALLY don't take any during the day, and if I do it's only a half tablet and it's usually first thing in the am or after we get home from school. Now I can't help it if I looked shitty that day given my lack of sleep, and being sick, and god knows when I stress and get acne, I get it bad! But that's no reason what-so-ever to assume I neglet my child or would put her in any type of danger - ever! And it's no reason to call an agency that can potentially take my child away from me. It makes me downright furious! Especially when they have no clue as to what they are talking about. Ruben took my meds away from me to please CPS. I have no idea what is to happen next, as not a single person has called and talked to me, or come to the house. They seem at ease with Ruben's plan, no matter how much it hurts me. I will be getting a statement from my pain specialist's office to further back up the fact, that (A) I do not take them every 8 hours - otherwise I would need monthly refills and at the end of the month I end up having a great deal left over (B) That the medication he is prescribing to me is not too strong for me to take more than 1 half of a pill every night, and that I have been on this medicine for so long my body has easy adapted to it's potency and I am at no risk to be driving.
But the thing that really bothers me and hurts me the most is that my own husband doesn't even beleive me. He thinks I'm an addict just because at night before bed when I take all of my pills there will be time that I may stumble around or pass out - well gee I wonder why, ya think it could be cause I just took all my nightly medicines and am ready to go to sleep? He often goes on ranting and raving how he doesn't beleive my pain is real, just as he doesn't believe in my depression. You would think that he of all people should not only know it, but beleive it as he is witnessing it first hand. With all this mis-trust and dis-beleive I wouldn't be surprised if a divorce is soon to follow, and as I cannot work and have no where else to go, I often wonder what will become of me. Surely he will fight for custody and win. How am I to support her, let alone myself? I cannot go back to work now like this. I'll never be insured again if I get dropped from his plan. Sometimes I can't help but to think the worst as this has been a long hard road, and no step of it has ever gotten easier. In about a month I will be getting a decision on my disibility claim, and while the woman sounded very positive that they were not going to turn me down, I can't help but to think the worst - denial. So cross your fingers and say a little prayer for me, cause I need this money. It's getting tight with all my medical expenses, pills, appointments, surgeries, etc. And if denial happenes again, I am going to have to hire a lawyer that is going to take damn near half of what they owe me for the past 13 months. Cross your fingers because that will be a huge settlement! Damn it's nearly a whole years pay for most of the people I used to work with. So anyway, for now I await the judgement of CPS and anticipate an approval letter from SS soon (I hope & pray!) I will keep you all posted. Also, aside from Cynthia's card, I got an early Mother's Day gift of a new 4th generation 20gig Ipod- there's no color screen, but that's no big deal, but it does hold nearly 7000 songs all for my listening pleasure, now I just have to fill her up. Know 7000 good tunes? And while mine is white like the one shown, I've already placed a pink iskin on it to protect and give it some color, although I would like to find something a little more different than a silicone condom to sqeeze it in.

Just realized that I haven't really posted since coming bck from Vegas

Friday the 10th, almost as bad as Friday the 13th in my book.......my first dr. appointment of the day did not start the day off right. There were numerous problems there, and a lot of lies coming out of the office managers mouth. But once they actually spoke with the dr., it was all straighten out and both had apologized. Luckily my other 2 doctor appoinments for the day went well. But man was it great to get my back snapped and to get my trigger point shots!
Satuday I got up a little early to take my dog to her 10 am appointment at the groomer's. For once I thought I would do some thing really nice for my husband, since at home he's always the one to take my Durango in for whatever it needs. So I took his Ram over to Terrible's and changed his oil, since it was almost due. Then I bought him the best wash & polish to go with it. His truck was absolutely covered in mud, and I honestly can't remember the last time I've seen it totally clean inside and out. While they washed and waxed, I sat and played Bonus Poker. I ended up cashing out and winning $80. So basically, after the oil change and the wash, I broke even. Now that we are back home the Ram is once again just as dirty as ever!
After finishing up Saturday with the groomer's and errands, we went to see my mom at UMC. She didn't look as bad as I thought she would, that was until I saw her drain. I would estimate that it was a circle in her stomach of about 5" diameter and what appeared like a catheter bag that drained and collected the fluid that was accumulating in her stomach from her liver. It was a harsh site. I expected it to be more like the ball bulbs I had when I had my many breast surgeries, but this was a much different site. (Since then they have finally released her, although she is still leaking, and she is staying at a friend's house in Vegas, while we wait for the doctor's to come up with a permenent solution - as the problem is not going to fix itself.)
Monday, I followed-up with my last doctor apointment, then we hit the road for home. Once again, he changed my meds. How am I ever going to start feeling like myself when they keep changing my meds on me? So anyway, we got home late Monday night, as Ruben had to return to work Tuesday morning.
Since I have a few other posts to make today, let me share with you before and after pictures of Ruben's Ram.
Before - after a day of muddin' when the truck wasn't even a month old:









After, almost looking brand spanking new again:

Tagged (again) Sometimes I think I shouldn't read other's blogs!

1)Legal First name?
Angela (middle name) Christine
2)Were you named after anyone?
Somewhat. I was a January baby, and while my Mom and Grandma put up the Christmas tree, they kind of discussed baby names. My Grandma gave my Mom an Angel that sits on the tree, and somehow that is how they came up with my name. Angela Christine for the Angel of Christ.
4)Do you wish on stars?
Now that I can see them way out here in the Country – sure, every now and then.
5)When did you last cry?
Yesterday at my doctor’s office.
6)What is your favorite lunch meat?
I don’t really have one. I very rarely eat sandwiches, unless of course we are at Subway or Port-of Subs, then it’s a BMT or a #1 - Ham, Salami, Capicolla,Pepperoni & Provolone.
7)What is your birth date?
January 26th.
8) What is your most embarrassing CD/tape?
Oh boy….not even really sure what CD’s I own anymore, but I know I have some Country ones like Tim McGraw and a German Rock band called Rammstein.
9)If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you?
Hmmm, I’d have to go with a yes. I have my moments, but most of my friends love me in spite of them!
10)Do you use sarcasm a lot?
Uh, that would be daily.
11)What are your nicknames?
Ang & Honey top the list now, but when I was little my mom called me Peanut Butt and Petunia.
12)Would you bungee jump?
That’s a hard one, in my wild days yeah – but I’m afraid of heights, so I think someone would have to push me!
13)Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Nope, too lazy – put them on already tied too!
14)What is your favorite ice cream flavor?
Neapolitan. Italian Spumoni. Pistachio Almond.
15)Shoe Size?
9 ½ to a 10 – depends on what type of shoes.
16) Red or pink?
Pink SHOULD be my color for breast cancer, but I can’t seem to give up Red, Black or Blue.
17)What is your least favorite thing about yourself?
Right now? My hair. I hate how it is growing back! But before that it’s mostly been my weight.
18)Who do you miss seeing the most?
My friend, Rhonda who lives in Reno. Although it’s only a 4 hour drive to see each other now, life always gets in the way.
19)Favorite past-time?
Scrapbooking, TV, shopping.
20)What color pants/skirt & shoes are you wearing?
Still in my jammies, so no shoes. Red tee and red plaid flannel pants.
21)What are you listening to right now?
My daughter playing alone with her Barbie’s.
22)What did you eat for breakfast?
I don’t really do breakfast.
23)If you were a crayon, what color would you be?
Pacific Blue….or anything in the Blue family.
24)What is the weather like right now?
Cold with bits of snow still on the ground.
25)Last person you talked to on the phone?
No one yet today.
26)What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Their eyes and smile.
27)Coffee or tea?
Neither. I get my caffeine from Soda! Preferably Mr. Pibb.
28)Favorite Drink?
Mr. Pibb or Sonic’s Strawberry Limeade.
29)Hair Color?
Just dyed it Burgandy a few weeks ago, and on Saturday to keep the color from fading I added this Funky Cherry 8-10 week mousse dye.
30)Do you wear contacts?
Yeah because I hate wearing glasses!
31)Favorite Food?
Hmm, Steaks from The Star, my MIL Enchilada’s, and Korean Kal-bi with rice & kimchee.
32)Last Movie You Watched?
A lot Like Love (again- I so love that movie!), Monster-in-law, and Be Cool (again!)
33)Favorite Day of the Year?
Sunday – so I can watch Grey’s Anatomy and The Soprano’s.
34)Scary Movies or Happy Endings?
Happy endings most definately!
35)Summer or winter?
Hard to decide since I haven’t been home for Spring & Summer – but I know this, I hate Elko Winters and Vegas Summers!
36)Hugs OR Kisses?
Depends on who from…..I like both!
37)What Is Your Favorite Dessert?
Carrot Cake.
38)Have you ever won any awards?
Not any worth remembering.
39)Do you have any tattoos or piercings?
Only my ears now, but I used to have my eyebrow, tongue and belly button pierced (in my skinnier days!) and I have 5 tattoos, which is my limit. I have A rose on my ankle, a rose band on the other ankle, a rose on my right shoulder, a frog & lily pad on the left shoulder, and a custom tribal on my right bicep.
40)Living Arrangements?
I live in a house with my Hubby of 6+ years, our 6 y/o daughter and our 3 ½ y/o cock-a-poo dog.
41)What Books Are You Reading?
Scrapbook idea books, and a book on Digital Photography for Dummies.
42)What's On Your Mouse Pad?
Nothing. I don't use one.
43)What did you watch last night on TV?
Grey’s Anatomy, The Soprano’s then Big Love.
44)Favorite Smell?
Pearberry bath & body stuff from Victoria’s Secret.
45)Favorite Junk Food?
Ice Cream.
46)Rolling Stones or Beatles?
Neither. Ick!
47)What's the farthest you've been from home?
I grew up in Illinois, near St. Louis, MO. and the sumer before my Senior year of HS we moved to Hawaii.

Now I tag everyone reading this!

March 8, 2006 - Back to Vegas......again (REVISED)

I have learned that I should not make posts late at night when I am tired and cannot think. I tend to leave things out, and since my fingers are too big for the keyboard on my laptop - I often mis-spell things. So for started, let me just say that if memory serves corectly, March 8 is the birthday of an old friend of mine, and I meant to do a happy birthday shout out to Bryan, who I hardly get to talk to anymore, but I hope is doing well! Secondly, let me go through the post below and correct all the errors I made and fill in the info I forgot........

Well as it stands, I am leaving tomorrow after Natalie gets out of school to head to Vegas for a short trip. I have doctor appointments on Friday and Monday....yay (not!) Sometimes I really hate these trips because there is so much running around packed into just a few days. Friday alone I have 3 dr. appointments, Saturday I take my dog in for grooming, not sure what Sunday holds, but I need to see my Mom while I am there, then Monday I have another dr. appointment before we hit the road and come home. Originally I was going to have to go this trip alone - well with my daughter and dog too of course. Ruben had a class, but managed to get out of it, thank god, cause I just don't know if I could make the 7 hour drive by myself. I hate mountains, I hate snow, and worse yet - I hate driving in them - even though I have studded snow tires! But Ruben got out of the class, with a catch. I intended on driving back on Tuesday cause anyone who lives up this way knows that you do not drive around here at night....there are lots of deer and elk, and driving can be totally unsafe. But his boss is coming here on Tuesday, so we have to frive home Monday night regardless, which totally sucks.....a 7 hour drive after all that Vegas traffic and my doctor appointment means we won't get home till around midnight. Anyway I couldn't make the trip on my own as I usually end up sleeping most of the way. I do this to not stress over Ruben's fast driving or passing, and aside from that, I wouldn't even really know how to get there or back. I know, we've been to Vegas a million times, but still, when your eyes are shut you can't tell which way you are going! Also I know it seems like I am always going to the doctor, and trust me, it's not JUST that it seems like I am, but I am!
We have so much remodeling to around here to do, but never have the time to do any of it! I've been trying for a few months to get estimates so we can get carpet and tile installed, but first I have to pack up my scrap room so Ruben can remodel it (I want it to look more like Cynthia's and be more organized!). I also want so badly to do something with the yard. We need major curb apeal, but being winter, snow or not, it's hard to find someone to clear the brush off my 3 acres of land and pour a concrete circular drive. It also doesn't help that Ruben gets so busy with work, some days I am half temped to get the trimmer out myself and cut the bushes along our house - which are fairly over grown! But me and powertools do not get along well, or at least that type. And yes, we do still have the majority of our Christmas decorations up, as I'm not about to climb on the roof, at this point we might as well just leave them up till December! Oh, and what's even worse is that Ruben with all his Ebay ventures and working at home after work he hasn't found the time to do much either.......ugh! Hell we still have bathrooms and closets to finish painting and some spot work to do as well. Let me just say, although I have only helped a tiny bit, but PAINTING SUCKS!
I don't have much info yet on my mom to update. It sounds all very confusing. They say she doesn't have cancer, yet she is supposed to see an oncologist. That there makes no freaken sense to me. And what ever fluid has built up in her stomach is now leaking, thanks to massive surgeries from UMC - they did like 4 surgeries on her in one week! No one can tell them anything about what's going on, let alone answer my dad's questions. What surprises me the most is that my mom has remained so docile about this even though the nurses nearly killed her by ODing her on Morphine. That's NOT my mom at all, if she's not happy, no one is! Trust me, my mom is the Queen of Bitches - when she wants to be. I'm really surprised that she hasn't ripped someone a new asshole by now. It must be all the meds they are pumping into her, cause really, anyone who knows my mom is afraid to eat with her because she will complain about the slightest thing being wrong with her food, then we all have to wonder if the chef spit in all our food. But I really can't say too much on the subject, afterall I am JUST like her....just look at my medicine drawer and if that's not enough proof for you ......ask my hubby. He'll tell you that I am every bit as picky, pushy and controlling as my mom. What can I say, I know it's true - everybit of it, but I did learn it all from the best (does that make me the princess of bitches?).....and I'm certainly no push-over. I'm very opionated, strong willed, I have to have my way - always, and up untill childbirth, I was very much a cold hearted bitch - emotionally stable and solid as a rock......now I cry when I stress, I cry when I watch certain movies, sometimes I cry for no apparent reason. This confuses me because I have no hormones, especially not estrogren! Motherhood has killed off the cold hearted bitch that I was and made me sappy, but I'm still not a push-over. But hopefully these dumb ass doctors will get their shit together soon, and she can be released without having to return to the ER again within a few hours.
I'm so glad (and LUCKY too!) to have some of the best if not really great doctors taking care of me, but then again, I won't tolerate any shit.
I sure hope Vegas is warm and sunny, we could definately use some warmth and sunshine!

Back again - and so soon at that!

I didn't plan on making a post this morning, but about 3 am, a very excited little 6 year old woke up asking for a tissue to blow her nose. I later discover this was all a ploy to check if the Tooth Fairy had come yet. Once she discovered that she had, she would not be quiet long enough to go back to sleep. So here I am. I've been physically awake since 3 am. I've gotten out of bed, folded 3 baskets of laundry, put another in the dryer, put my daughter in the tub, and have been working online doing various things. After I get Natalie out of the tub, I will be heating up a nice steak sandwhich from The Star Restaurant. YUM! Nothing like a Star steak. What a way to start my Friday. I am going to be so dead tired, it's not even going to be funny. I can only hope that Natalie will be just as tired after school, so we can nap!

I've realized during my time of drama, chaos and sadness, I had neglegted to tell you the positive things going on in life. My hubby discovered selling on Ebay, and to his own accord has sold off all his collectibles. Prior to either one of us working in the Gaming industry, we used to collect $10 Silver Strike tokens that are fairly hard to get. He had some from quite a few imploded casinos such as the Dunes, which no longer exists. Aside from selling his coins, he also sold off his Monster Truck collection - my baby boy has grown up. I'm so proud! In his first week alone, he made over $500. So he started searching the house for stuff to sell. While he is still on his mission, he has made at least $1500 to date, and has bought us a shitload of goodies. He bought himself a Flowmaster air intake for his Ram truck - he's also supposed to be getting me one for my Durango as well. He's also gotten a new PSP, tons of games, and who knows what else as I am getting packages everyday. What I do know is that out of the kindness of his heart he bought me the 2 other lenses I wanted for my digital camera.


































And on the 18th while watching QVC's Scrapbooking with Creating Keepsake's - which is ALWAYS a bad idea when you have a Q card, I couldn't resist but buy a Quickutz die cutter since they had it on 3 easy pays......I also broke down and bought the matching numbers to the CK Typist font the cutter came with, but since then my hunny has also been gracious enough to buy me the complete classic QK Lucy font off Ebay.







I could go seriously go crazy buying these dies and fonts, and will as long as he's bringing in the dough from Ebay. I swore I would never buy a QK since I have a Sizzix and Sizzlits die machine, but at least I didn't bet money on it or anything. - but now that I have some of the dies I've been waiting for, I can finally finish this Swap I signed up for that is due next month. Am I a procrastinator or what?

Chaos, a baby, and a tooth on the loose?

Well I'm back for a brief while. There is still major chaos going on in my life that I am trying to deal with.
My husband is in Reno for the week, and just found out that he cannot make it to my various doctor appointments next month, so it looks as though even though I have never driven alone to Vegas, I will be on the 9th with my daughter and dog.
Also, it seems no two doctor's can agree on my Mom's current condition....1 says Cancer, another says Liver Cirrhosis. First it was Colon Cancer, then Ovarian Cancer (mind you my mom hasn't had ovaries in 30 years or more), and now they say the fluid in her abdomen is from her liver. She's been at UMC all week and they have already done 2 surgeries on her and plan for probably 2 more. Good thing the insurance is paying for it, because not only can these doctor's not agree, but they love to bilk the insurance company - doing each procedure seperately and deeming it necessary.
But on a positive note, I'm a brand new Auntie to Matthew Makanaokalani - yes he is half Hawaiian, and half Haole. He was a long time in the making, and we are very glad he is finally here after all those years.
Also, my daughter Natalie, who I last posted as having two loose teeth, has finally lost one and expects a visit from the Tooth Fairy tonight. The tooth had been very loose for a while and we had tried everything short of traumatizing the poor kid.....daily apples, wiggling it with her finger, playing with it with her tongue - and nothing helped it to come out naturally. So following a friend's advice who works in a dental office, she told me to give her some advil, put lots of baby oragel on it, wait 5 minutes and yank it out with a wash cloth if I couldn't grasp it with my fingers. Well I tried that a few times, and still couldn't grip it, so I was forced to pull out the ol' spool of thread. She was nervous, and I could hardly get the thread notted around the tooth. Todat woulda been a good day to be a boy scout and know how to do slipknots! I finally got it around her little tooth, when she began to panic. I calmed her down, used the wash cloth to wipe the tears away and waited about 10 seconds till she was calm and yanked as hard as I could. She bled a little, but was so excited she begged me to pull her other tooth, but it's not nearly loose enough. Here are some pictures of her brand new toothless grin and the bag I bought for the Tooth Fairy. Till next time, enjoy!