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4.01.2008

Life is too short to be stuck with a bad doctor!

I met with the new oncologist today. Let's just say I wouldn't recommend him to anyone other than a proctologist, cause he was an asshole. Very cocky, authoritative. I've been through all this before, so if my seemingly relaxed nature comes off like I don't care, it is an incorrect interpretation. My attitude is that of a strong, young, woman who knows that she will beat this and survive. I've been through it before, and it looks to not have spread - so I know I can beat it again. My original cancer diagnosis was only a stage 11a. Well this guy wants me to see a surgical oncologist and a radiation oncologist like yesterday, so he asked how my schedule was the rest of this week and I answered truthfully - I have the TV repair man coming, I offered to watch neighborhood kids Thursday as it is half-day and Friday I have a parent teacher conference to attend. He told me that I need to prioritize my schedule, that the neighbors should understand and blah, blah, blah if I want to be there for my daughter when she grows up.

WHOA wait a minute, did he just try to use the death card to trump my cancer card? I told him I will be there when she grows up, but I have to be at her conference - also it is not fair to ask the neighbors to watch my child and help me so that I can make appointments, yet turn them down when they need help. If I do that then next time I need someone to help out I will have no one around to do it. I am thinking priorities, but practical ones. If I had my choice I'd do chemo now. Well this guy is anti-chemo, he wants me to do radiation. I asked him why not and why for, to which he could answer neither. He told me that I'm not going to get what I want just because I want it, that he'll prescribed whatever treatment he thinks is best and that's that. Yet he couldn't tell me why? He said he wants me to see the surgical oncologist because my pathology showed that the margins were not clear, but he is saying that since they were not clear more than likely my tissue expander's will need to be removed. I asked why I can't go through chemo or radiation with them in and again he had no answer - gee what an effing surprise! Now I'm sorry, I may only have lil ant hill mound, but it has taken nearly 3 tears to
get this far and I really don't plan on turning back - at least not yet and at least not without some serious answers! I REALLY want to go to Ochsner for treatment, whatever it may be, but I do not like cocky, blindsided decisions - or being told I was going to die, or that things need to happen yesterday when it took me 3 WEEKS to get in and see him. UH!

I will go see both doctors and fit it into my schedule this week if they are even available - but one thing for sure: NEW DOCTOR STAT! I already have the scheduler checking with her team of other doctors to find out when their schedule might be available. If that backfires I have appointments on both the 11th and 24th. I believe that you and your doctor should have a beautiful partnership between the two of you, not one where the other talks down to you or belittles you. I've had a lifetime of bad docs and am smart enough to now know to shop around. There are more than just one of you, and it's not about getting the answer I like best but about finding a doctor I work best with!
So for not the search continues as this fool told me absolutely NOTHING - in fact, I think I may have taught him a thing or two about my charts!

Oh and the pix of our mini-vacay are finally up on Flickr - go enjoy them!

1 comment:

Shannon said...

Good for you! Even with all of the things going on in your life, you are still finding the time to be involved in Nat's education. So many parents can't even be bothered...and they don't deal with all the other things that you do!! Trust me, Nat's teachers appreciate you being there more than you know! Take it from a teacher! :-)