Home Again

Hi All!

We're back from vacation, and as I type this, some 275 pictures from our trip are slowly being uploaded to Flickr. We had a wonderful vacation with the exception of the heat and rain. I'll never book another trip there in the middle of the summer. It wasn't just that the temp was in the 90's, it's that with the heat index the temperature was well over 110! Heat like that just really zaps the energy right out of ya! We got back Tuesday evening, and we're still trying to settle in. Ruben of course unpacked as soon as we got home - my suitcase is still sitting on the floor. Luckily, the house we rented was equipped with a washer and dryer, so we brought back very little dirty laundry.

Now that we're back, we're hitting the diet hard! I was fortunate enough not to gain anything while we were gone - but I didn't lose any either. Of course there is no such thing as dieting while on vacation, so I ate like a mad woman. I only broke even due to the many miles we walked daily.

Yesterday I finally got my car back from the Dodge dealership after two full months! Once I got in my car I discover that my stereo and XM reciever were not working - and since it's aftermarket equipment they are not responsible for it. I was completely livid, cause the service manager was a complete jerk about it. He tried to make like since he gave me a oil change on the house, that we were even. Ha! A $30 oil change does not make up for possibly frying more than $1000 worth of stereo equipment. Ruben took it to the place that installed it, Car Audio Connection over in Harahan and the guys there fixed it for free. I'm just so relieved that I didn't need a new unit. When they pulled out the deck they found that the dealership hadn't even re-connected the wires. So now I wonder what else they may have done half ass.

Also, yesterday I had a follow up appointment with my plastic surgeon. Sometime in the near future I will be going back into surgery to correct my left breast. I don't really know when yet, cause first we have to get approval from the insurance company. But I will keep you posted.

We have Saline!!!!

Saw my surgeon yesterday, post-op things have been well. Spoke to him in regards to my concern that the expander on my left side seems off center, and high. I kinda feel like I might be getting a side boob, although I suppose it could all be just swollen since he did cut me open on my side. The doctor really didn't seem too concerned with it, as he found that while looking for the expanders and the valve to inject the saline into, the magnets weren't exactly where they should be. My right expander shifted a little to the left, and my left one shifted a little further up and to the left. I guess it's one of those things that will get fixed when he swaps them out as he went ahead with the injections. YAY! This is a first for me, and I consider it to be a BIG step! He told us that the major concern is to be careful not to nick the implant with the needle - that's why he uses this device with magnets in it and made marks all around my chest. He was quite careful in making sure he found each valve. It honestly didn't hurt as bad as I anticipated. I didn't look, but my guess would be that it was a descent size needle. I have this vision in my head of the port I had in my chest when I went through chemo, and what the needle looked like that they stuck in there. I even got the same sensation, of this alcohol like smell, even though just a little pad was used to clean the injection site - so I'm thinking it wasn't alcohol, but saline as they used to clear my port with a shot of saline before and after each chemo treatment. So anyway, he started with the left side, and I felt the pressure right away, but tried my hardest to take more before telling him to stop. The right side didn't hurt at all - but then again, it's been over 2 years since I had a mastectomy done on the right side. Actually on the 26th it will be 3 years since I found the lump, as I found it on the night of my 31st birthday. But as I was saying, I didn't feel any pressure on that side, but he stopped anyway as he wanted to make sure and fill them with equal amounts. Funny thing is, my right side is bigger than my left. Don't ask why, cause I haven't a clue. Maybe cause it shifted? But I have a little AA like lump on the right side, and I'm so proud of it. I wish that the left side was just as dominant, but we're thinking that muscle may be playing a part in it all. See when they did my right side, a small portion on my muscle was removed. The expander as well as the implants get placed underneath the muscle - supposedly it is supposed to make them look more natural? I dunno. But since none of the muscle was removed on my left side, maybe that's why that side isn't sticking out as much as the other - like the muscle is holding it more tightly back? Heck if I know, I'm no doctor, I just know that I do not look even although they both received the same amount of saline. My left side still hurts some, as it feels tight. The right side feels great, it's even softened up since the appointment, whereas my left side is still kinda hard. Hopefully it will be feeling better soon as I go back next Tuesday for more injections. Looks like this will be a weekly thing, as long as I can handle the pain/pressure - and if it continues like this, I shall have boobs in no time! WooHoo!

Holiday Weekend Update

Boy, it sure feels like it's been a while since my last post. I've been busy this past weekend. Friday I met with my new pain doctor. He's changing up my meds, starting me on a new regimen, and had someone come by today to give me a RS-4i Stimulator for my back & to fit me for a Spinal Orthosis lower back brace. The Stimulator is one of those machines with the sticky pads that deliver electrical pulses to the areas in which the pads are placed. It's a pretty cool machine, and it's mine thanks to my insurance. On Saturday, I woke up fairly early (7 am) which is rather odd for me. So I woke Ruben and we all got ready and spent the day at the movies. We had already seen Spiderman 3 on opening day while at Disney. So we checked out Shrek the 3rd and Pirates 3. Both good flicks, but all that theatre time was hard on the ass! Sunday we drove to Houma with the plan of going to Home Depot to stock up on brick pavers, weed block, and lava rock to re-do some of the yard, but decided to first get estimates for concrete curbing instead. At least that way it will take away half of the hard work. Besides, I need to get someone out here to lay concrete in the back yard to extend our patio. Instead we ended up at Office Depot and bought a new 37" LCD HD TV for our bedroom. Now Natalie's room is the only room (other than the guest room) that doesn't have a HD TV. Afterwards we continued on to Lowes were we finally found all the lights for the baths, once we start that remodeling project....of course that is one project the contractor will be doing - once I find one! For Memorial Day we just stayed at home indoors and chilled out. One of the new meds the pain doctor has me on causes drowsiness, so I ended up napping most of the day which spoiled our plans to work in the yard, which is fine by me! It's going to take me a few days to get used to this medication. Somehow it's supposed to help with the effects from chemo and the chemo agent I take daily (my Femara medication) but so far it seems like it only adds to the effects! Today was a big day. I saw my Plastic Surgeon this afternoon and we nailed down a date for my surgery. We set the date for July 23rd so I can fly my mother-in-law out here for the week to help out with Natalie. My little brother-in-law will also be coming out and staying for a month. Now aside from getting ready to have surgery (which I am having on both sides, as I am having my other breast removed), I need to find furniture for our guest room so Ruben's mom has somewhere to sleep. Of course I also need to get estimates for concrete, tree trimming, bathroom remodeling, and also go to another dozen doctor appointments. It's going to be a busy, crazy summer - just hope I have enough energy to stay awake to get it all done!

Only a few more days!!!!

It's finally here, the weekend we leave for our much anticipated vacation to Disney World. As much as I am excited about going, I'm just not very motivated about packing. It's not about the last minute laundry I 'm wanting to get done in order to do the actual packing. It's not even really the act itself as pretty much most of of the stuff we're taking is sitting in a big pile next to the suitcases.

I guess what it boils down to is that over the last few days I have had some serious family issues weighing heavily on my mind, heart, and wallet. I've managed to keep the majority of this under wraps for the last 6 months, but in that time keeping it all bottled up has done nothing but build anger. It's gotten to the point where I'm so pissed off I can't see straight. I finally managed to vent some of the anger, but it seems that all that has done is cause me more. I'm pissed off and frustrated and I don't know what to do anymore. I knew that these issues would one day be a problem. When my Mom first became ill last February, I had begged her to revert her will to her previous wishes, and to give me some sort of legal power. Of course she dismissed it all, saying everything will be fine. Yet everything is not fine. Here I am the ugly-red-headed step-child I always knew I was. In all actuality, I'm fine with having no dad or step-dad. The others came and went and life went on just fine without them. The only difference is that this time there is a child involved. One who loves her grandpa, and likes to talk to him - yet he's never home when she calls, and hardly ever calls her. This is one of the many things that pisses me off cause no one fucks with my daughter. The pain it brings me to see her cry cause grandpa's not home to answer the phone. Ruben's mom calls her every Sunday, and has since October. The other problem is my disabled brother Bill who lives in Vegas. He was just left on his own to fend for himself, and now that Social Security has cut off his disability he has been having financial problems. And just who do you think has been taking the responsibility for him and paying his bills? Yup, me. Thankfully my sister has offered to help as well, so I wouldn't have to bear the burden of all the costs alone - but still even at half, it adds up over months and months. Our step-dad, well let me say that he hasn't taken the initiative to help - he hasn't offered to help, nor given us any money for the thousands already shelled out. I really hope wherever my mom is she is kicking herself for not listening to me, and can hear me say I TOLD YOU SO!

Now hopefully since I have gotten this off my chest and vented, I will be able to actually enjoy the vacation that we have saved for over the last 9 months!

Oh, and when I come back, guess what I have to look forward to???? I'm finally going to undergo the first stage of reconstruction again. June 1st I will be admitted overnight after they implant a tissue expander. After the weekly saline injections for it to stretch to size, it will be replaced with a regular breast implant, and during that time is when they will remove my other breast and also replace it with an implant. Let's just hope that I have better results this time than with my last expander surgery which was unsuccessful!

Project and Other Things

Ok, well I finally started using MySpace. It's not that I didn't have an account, cause I did, it's just that it has always directed everyone here. So it's not like I'm late jumping on the bandwagon or anything. I've used it just to talk to a few people, but now I have some family on there, so I'm sort of using it a little more. I do have some different pictures on there, I think, and I do really, love, love, love my layout on there. I wish I could figure out how to customize Blogger layouts. I am so into the whole pink, black, skull stuff right now. IF ANYONE CAN CUSTOMIZE A BLOGGER LAYOUT FOR ME LIKE DESCRIBED ABOVE, PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT! It so suits me! If you want to check it out, it's under my favorite links, or go here.
So on with today's topic......We bought our house here in Louisiana back in 12/06 and we've been busy every since. We are still unpacking, painting, peeling wallpaper, replacing ceiling fans, light fixtures, we need dirt to level out the backyard, and we have 3 full baths to remodel, PLUS a vacation for 10 full nights to Disney World and co. coming up at the end of April.
On top of that we have the every day stuff like homework, dinner, yardwork, shopping, laundry, family drama, housework and the like to contend with. One example is like yesterday Natalie's toilet overflowed. For some reason the flapper didn't shut when she flushed it, so water just kept pouring out of the toilet onto the floor. I couldn't get it to shut, so I hurried up and shut the valve off and asked her to get the mop from downstairs. When she came up she said she heard water downstairs. I went down to see what it was and found water raining from the light fixture in the downstairs bath. By time I got back upstairs all the water in her bathroom was gone. The bathroom downstairs continued to leak for some hours. We turned on the air, and have several fans going - but now it looks like we will have to paint the entire ceiling of the first floor. Just pray we don't end up with mold damage, or that the ceiling caves in!
Also, if that weren't bad enough, it's tax time again! And we haven't had our taxes done yet - I'm really fearful we might owe. I'm pulling out all the home improvement stuff, but I can't find my donation receipts for write off. Owing would be the worst as we have to save our $ for taxes and insurance (mostly flood - think Katrina, it made insurance down here go up to $5000/yr.) to pay later this year - plus we still have stuff to buy for Disney.
Oh, and I guess I can count out having my mastectomy/reconstruction surgery done before vacation. The plastic surgeon hasn't called back - still waiting for insurance approval, since I want them both done, and now it's too late, I'm not going to Disney sore. It will have to wait till I come back.
I also forgot to post pictures from the other day. It's crawfish season down here and that's what we had for dinner. They were good although a bit spicy from the boil seasonings. Ruben said he's had better. I thought it pretty much tasted like most shellfish, and probably woulda been good with some cocktail sauce or something. Anyway, here's the pictures from that and one of this huge ass dragon fly I caught in the front yard. We had a whole tree full of them!

Oh, I almost forgot! Just when I though I bottomed out, I lost another 2 lbs. It happened in just a matter of like 3 days. I really need to take those weight loss pills more regularly, cause when I do, this is what happens! Wahoo!