May 17, 2005 - He leaves, and I'm sick again!

Ruben flew out yesterday for his meeting in Sacramento, and I puked for the second time. This time is was neither fun nor pretty. I had felt sick most of the day, especially when I stood up. Funny how every time Ruben comes to town, then leaves, I end up puking? I’ve even noticed my sense of smell is very strong, and often bothers me. The side effects from chemo are really setting in now.

May 13, 2005 – Flyin’ in on Friday the 13th

Here it is Friday the 13th and Ruben is flying in on some little crop duster plane. Talk about stress and superstition. I picked him up today from the North Las Vegas Airport. He’s here for the weekend before flying to Sacramento on Monday for his Regional Meetings. It was nice to have him here for the weekend, but it wasn’t nearly enough time, especially when you have no energy. He and Natalie went to the park and kicked around the ball and played t-ball. She had so much fun. She is such a tomboy! Regardless, she was in desperate need of some daddy time.

May 12, 2005 - I've got more pin pricks from needles than a pin cushion

I'm still handling my chemo fairly well, so I can't complain. I really can't even complain about these Neulasta injections I am getting on the day after. They really don't hurt much since it goes into the fat. But I feel as though I have been poked by so many needles, I look as though I'm either a druggie or a pin cushion. But on a side note, the Neulasta REALLY makes my bones ACHE. I feel SOOOOOOOO old. It's really not funny!

May 11, 2005 - Third down

Here I am, my third chemo, I'm almost done, YAY! Bad thing is that it’s starting to wear on me now. Food doesn’t really taste good anymore. I still want it, but everything burns my mouth, and nothing tastes good. I’m tired all the time, and I really mean ALL the time, problem is I can't seem to sleep much at night. I have such a hard time getting out of bed. I have a hard time sleeping and concentrating. The sides of my head are bald, but the majority of my hair is still there. A few days before my appointment I broke out with what I though was acne (which is normal when I get stressed), but instead ended up being a viral rash I guess. The nurses are the ones who told me when I was there, the doctor had to give me antibiotics for it. There are other side effects too, but I won’t get that personal….let's just say, we don't know each other that well for me to be telling you intimate details of that nature.

May 7, 2005 - Race For The Cure

This morning I got up at 5 am, after barely sleeping just 2 hours so my mom & I could participate in The Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure down at the Fremont Street Experience. This is how we chose to celebrate Mother's Day this year, and we raced (more like walked slowly) in celebration of me, having 2 treatments down and only 2 left to go. Even though I had to get up so early, which was a VERY difficult thing for me to do, being there among 15,000+ other people was a great feeling. Just thinking about it now gets me all choked up. I met Paula Francis from Channel 8 News for the first time and mom and I had our picture taken with her. Aside from her, I also met a lot of very open and caring strangers who just came up and hugged me and congratulated me. It was great to see so many women who have survived breast cancer, and these little old ladies who had so much life and vigor. Needless to say it was a very special day for me, because it reminded me to never give up hope. Afterwards, we met up with Grampa Vince and Natalie and had a Mother's Day lunch at Joe's Crab Shack.
(In case you are wondering, in the picture - I'm on the left, Paula's in the middle and mom's on the right.)

May 3, 2005 - I feel like I might as well move to my doctor's office!

This was my second follow-up appointment with my oncologist, and once again, my labs were great. Overall I felt pretty good. Good appetite, little to no nausea, some mouth sores, lots of hot flashes, very tired, my taste buds felt burnt, and nothing tasted good or like it really should. I complained again about my arm, so he referred me to a lymphedema specialist and wrote me a prescription for a compression sleeve. Unfortunately, the specialist isn’t on my plan, and when I called, they don’t actually have a lymphedema specialist on staff. So I am back to where I started at. The pain and issues with my arm just don't seem to end!

April 29, 2005 - Bald is Beautiful, right?

I got so fed up with watching my hair fall out handfuls at a time that today I borrowed hair clippers and gave myself a buzz cut. It was just too depressing to watch it fall out every time I touched my head. It took me all day to work up the nerve, but once I did, I felt better. My daughter looked at the hair on the floor and said OH MY GOD look at all that hair! Then she looked at me and said OH MY GOD you look just like Uncle Rudy. She immediately dumped all her markers out and wanted to know if she could draw on my head now. When I told her no, that I still had some hair left, she told me, well then go shave it all off! Which I didn't, I wasn't completely ready for that just yet. After that she continued to pet my head, saying she loved how it felt. She may have loved it, but I felt like a dog being petted like that!

April 28, 2005 - Needles are my friend.

Yesterday's chemo faired well with me. My appetite stayed fairly good, I was just mainly tired. I went in today for my Neulasta injection to boost my white blood cell count again. I wouldn't want to get sick, being worn down is enough for me. I also noticed my first signs of hair loss today (LOTS) and it was rather depressing! Also my face was red – like it had been sunburned. These are just the "good" side effects. LOL.

April 27, 2005 - Round 2.

The time has come. It's time for my second round of chemo. I'm still nervous. I think mostly because Ruben's not here with me. Before going I rubbed some Lidocaine cream on my port and covered with plastic wrap, so it wouldn't hurt when they started the chemo. My appetite still seems to be good, but I have noticed that I am way more tired than usual. However, I am still driving myself to and from, unlike I thought I would be. So it's not that bad.

April 22, 2005 - A wig at the swap meet?

I bought a wig today. My insurance company wouldn’t cover the RX my doctor wrote, it’s not in my plan, so I went ahead and bought one so I would be prepared. I had went to Serge's, but the wig's there were like $200. Hell with that. I found the yellow page listings and started going to them all. I found a wig I liked at the swap meet of all places! And it was only $60. Sure beats $200. After shopping, mom took me to Diane’s house for a Stampin’ Up workshop party with all the Red Hat gals. I had a good time, made a cute album, and even agreed to host my own workshop. Mom’s old lady friends are nice, and let me tell you, they have everything a scrapping girl could dream of! Looking back, I'm glad I didn't spend more on a wig - in this Vegas heat, I haven't worn a wig more than once (or anything else on my head for that matter)!

April 21, 2005 - I am whole again......kinda!

Today's the big day, the day I went and got fitted for my bras and prosthetic breast. It’s so nice to actually wear a bra again! I feel somewhat whole for the most part. What a nice feeling. Never thought a fake silicone breast and 4 new bras could make me feel so good about myself, but they did!

April 19, 2005 - Off to the doctor's again!

Today, I had my first follow-up appointment with my oncologist to see how I am responding to the chemo. My labs come back perfect. Since it’s been 6 weeks since my surgery, I was able to FINALLY get prescriptions for bras, and a prosthetic. I'm so excited to be able to wear a bra! I felt so trailer trash walking around with nothing but a camisole top on for the last 6 weeks. I’ve been very lucky not to have lost any hair yet, but I have experienced an increase in hot flashes. I reminded him that I am still having problems w/ pain in my arm, and now I am experiencing lymphedema.

April 17, 2005 - Baby Bye Bye Bye

Ruben flew home today. The “kids” and I are on our own, so to say. We’re staying at his mom’s, but still, my rock is gone, their dad is gone. Can I get through this without him? For the first time ever, I puked today.

April 15, 2005 - What's a Muga Scan?

Don't know what it is, but I found out today. It's one of the test my oncologist ordered before having chemo done, but due to scheduling I couldn't get it done till after. It's supposed to be a very important test for checking my heart and surrounding tissue as chemo drugs can be very damaging to the heart tissue. So I went in for this Muga Scan. This was a fun test (NOT!). I had to be injected with 2 different types of nuclear medicine (no it didn’t make me glow!) 20 minutes apart, which had to be injected into my vein and they could not use my port. Since I have such horrible veins they decided to start an IV. Lucky me. The tech tried twice. No luck. She went and got help. He had to use an ultrasound machine to find my vein. Every since my mastectomy I am limited to only left arm for blood draws and pressure because I do not have lymph nodes in my right side. I cannot risk having someone stick my right arm and getting an infection. So I have 1 arm and only so many veins. Once he got the IV in and we got the meds in, I had to lie still on this machine for 10 minutes while it scanned my heart. The purpose was to make sure that my heart and the surrounding tissue are both capable of withstanding the effects of the chemotherapy. My results came back exactly as it should. It's good to know I at least have a good ticker!

April 14, 2005 - Injection time!

Well I survived my first chemo. Now it's time to go in for my first Neulasta injection to help boost my white blood cell count. This shot is what's going to help make sure that I don't get sick or too run down, cause if I do, then my chemo treatments will have to stop for a while till I get better. The shots aren't bad, the nurse gives it to me in the fat of my belly and believe me, I have plenty of fat in my belly for these shots!

April 13, 2005 - Day one of Chemo. 1 down 3 to go – thanks to all.

Today is my first day for chemo. They made me watch a film on it first, which took about an hour or so. The film was mostly to answer common questions; afterwards it was time for the real deal. I was nervous as all hell. It was funny, because to ease my nerves, Ruben and I started to watch Titanic. There’s nothing like watching a tragic love story while getting chemo. But once she started, it was no big deal really. They flush my port with saline, then draw blood to make sure it is working right, but they flush it all back in. Once all that is done they start an IV, they give me some anti-nausea meds, then they push the chemo drugs, after the chemo drugs, they flush with saline again. The bad part is I can taste everything they push through. One chemo drug is red, the other is clear. When I pee, it is red to orange, and it smells so bad for the first 2 days, it is like pure medicine coming out it is enough to make you sick – that is just one of the many awful side effects that I won't even think about going into detail here!
I forgot to mention that I got an email sometime last week from one of my old co-worker’s here in Vegas, Reni, telling me that she had something for me and wanted to know how to get it to me. I told her I would stop by the office. I was quite curious what the hell she was talking about. I hate surprises and shit like this drives me nuts! I finally stopped by I think around the 11th, and it was the most beautiful card signed love all your Las Vegas Casino Service Friends and they all chipped in and bought me a $175 gift card for Michael’s Craft Stores. I don’t even know who all to thank. I know Nancy had a lot to do with it. She probably threatened bodily harm if people didn’t chip in money. Thank you Nancy and EVERYONE else in the Las Vegas office, I love you all so much. I was lucky enough to work with and for some of the best people you could ever imagine.

April 8, 2005 - A Cath and a Computer?

This morning I checked into the hospital and had my port placed in my chest to make chemo easier. I quickly remembered that Vegas hospitals sucks compared to the one in Elko. I'm stuck in this curtained off area with at least 5 other people. No private pre and post op rooms here! At first I was worried I was making the wrong decision, but when the nurses had a hard time starting an IV and couldn’t after 3 attempts, I knew I was doing the right thing. My port somewhat sticks out of my chest, and made my whole left chest area hurt like hell. I can’t even wear my seatbelt over my shoulder because of where she placed it – but it does make chemo easier! Afterward as my reward for all the things I have had to endure, or what I am about to endure, we went shopping at Circuit City and bought me a new notebook computer for my stay here. My Dell was ancient, and in desperate need of an upgrade. We had been “shopping” for a while and found a smoking deal on this, so Ruben said I was worth it. All so I can keep in touch with my honey and friends, how sweet of my man!

April 7, 2005 - The Fresh Surgeon

Today we met with the weirdest General Surgeon to see about getting a port-a-cath placed for chemo. She was more than a little weird; she cornered Ruben and got fresh with him! And by fresh I mean the woman damn near slipped her hand up his shorts, I kid you not! He was uncomfortable! But needless to say, we still scheduled my surgery for the next day. Hope she didn’t get fresh with me while I was knocked out!!!!

April 6, 2005 - Off with her hair!

I broke down today and did it. I met with my hair stylist Hope @ A Wild Hair and cut all my long locks off so it wouldn't be so traumatic when it started falling out. It felt so weird going from long hair all my life to short hair. The first thing my daughter said when she saw my new ‘do, was “it’s messy.” It didn't exactly make me feel any better about the new 'do, but she had a point. I had the original bedhead look long before Meg Ryan made it look good.

April 5, 2005 - The sentencing begins......

Today I met for the first time with my oncologist. We went over my pathology, history, tests, and what to expect. I was very surprised. I was getting off with what seemed like a “light” sentence. He only prescribed 4 chemotherapy treatments. I don’t know why I was surprised, after all, my pathology did say that they did not find any more cancer cells, and it has not been proven that the cancer has spread – so for all I know, I am already cancer free, but still, I’d rather do the chemo to be on the safe side. He did explain all the nasty side effects and did tell me that I would lose my hair. He sent me out for labs, tests, and a port-a-cath.

April 1, 2005 - Vegas here I come in need of friendly scrapping therapy!

How do you prepare and pack when you don't really know how long you'll be gone for? It's not an easy process. I called the oncologist office, but they couldn't really give me a clue. I'm thinking between 3 to 6 months, but still, how do you pack and prepare for an unknown future. It tooks some time, but finally we got the car all packed and we we're on the road by 7am. Viva Las Vegas.
On the 2nd in need of my own “therapy”, I rushed off to the one place I knew I could find my one friend closest to my heart, The Memories Expo. Because of everything going on, I had to cancel my trip and classes, but as it turned out, they still had my tickets at the door even though I had been given a refund. I scoured the floor in search of Sonia to surprise her. After all I had been though, I needed some time with a friend desperately. She was definitely surprised to see me - hell, I ran off to see her before seeing my own parents. But sometimes a girl just needs a hug from her friends. Here’s a pic from the Expo: me on the left, Sonia in the middle, and her pregnant sister in law Holly on the right.

March 30, 2005 - The Vagina Whisperer & a Clean House!

I picked up the name vagina whisperer from another person's blog, and I thought it was too funny. So on this day here I am off to have my post-op follow-up with my OB/GYN doctor for the hysterectomy I had on 2/24/05. It was a little early (I think she wanted to see me in 6 weeks), but I told her I was temporarily moving to Vegas for Chemotheraphy. She checked me out and gave me the thumbs up. Said everything looks great. No more yearly paps for me, YAY! But because of the breast cancer she can’t prescribe me hormones for menopause, so she gave me a blood pressure patch that has been shown to decrease hot flashes. It’s worth a try! Also, today I got a nice little surprise in the mail from some old co-worker friends in Reno. They sent me a nice card, some gift certificates to have the house cleaned NOT ONCE BUT TWICE, and a beautiful breast cancer bracelet. Thanks Tina, Gail, Tracie, & Claudia. It melted my heart to know everyone cared so much, and it was a much needed going away to Vegas present – now my hubby can KEEP the house clean!

March 29, 2005 - Yet another aspiration?

Yet again, another post-op follow-up with the General Surgeon. He had to aspirate the fluid again, but this time it hurt quite a bit. He wants to see me again in a week, but I told him that at the end of the week I was driving to Vegas so I could meet with my oncologist next week. So he suggested finding someone in Vegas to follow-up with if the fluid continues to build up.

March 22, 2005 - You're going to stick a needle where, and do what?

I went in today for another Post-op check-up. Mainly it was a wound check, and found that my breast had swollen and was filled with fluid that needed to be aspirated with a needle. Not much fun, but didn’t hurt much either. Because of this fluid, he now wants to see me again next week. Fun. He also wants me to meet with my oncologist next week. The only problem is that I don't have one yet. The only medical oncologist on my plan in the state is located in Las Vegas. And I’m here in Elko 7 hours away. We found another medical oncologist located in Twin Falls ID. but that’s about a 2 ½ hour drive each way, and I won’t be able to drive myself to all the treatments, and this poses a problem for childcare, as we have no one to watch our daughter. The only solution would be for my husband to take time off work, and wait the 4 hours while I get treatments…and he’ll have to do this every other week. After talking, we decided the Vegas thing works out better. We still have all our family and friends there, so my dog, daughter, and I will move in with my mother-in-law while I go through Chemo. It makes more sense; I’ll have someone to watch my daughter while I go to treatment, and even be able to get rides back and forth if needed. Plus I will have a larger support group made up of family and friends. Now we just need to settle a few details, like make the arrangements, tie up lose ends, and pack. Looks like Vegas here we come!

March 15, 2005 - Bye Bye Balls

I went to the doctor today for my post-op follow up. He removed my staples and the two drain bulbs. The staples being removed didn't hurt really, but the drain bulbs hurt like hell. On the outside I had about 2 feet of tubing (like IV tubing) attached to these two bulbs, but on the inside I had a smaller thinner tubing that was about 8 to 10 inches long. My husband said it was long and thin. It hurt like hell when they pulled it out, but once it was out - I had instant relief, just like an IV!

March 11, 2005 - Finally some good news!

The doctor called today. He had gotten the pathology report back from my mastectomy, and didn't want to wait till my next appointment. All 16 of my Lymph Nodes came back CANCER FREE. In fact, my pathology states, that except for a few residual foci at the original biopsy site, there was no other cancer cells to be found in my entire breast, nipple, lymph nodes, or chest wall. My General Surgeon says that even though it’s not in my lymph nodes, there’s still a small chance that the cancer can spread through my bloodstream to other organs of my body, but it is a small chance. Best news we've heard all year!

March 10, 2005 - I don't have a breast but I have 2 "Balls"

I was released from the hospital today (see last post on how the ASSistant surgeon practically kicked me out this morning)– but before I left a wonderful woman from the Quality of Life Center stopped by with a gift for me. She gave me a Teddy Bear and a camisole top with pillow-like breast insert. She offered her services to help out in ANY way. From support groups to running errands, you name it, she would do it. Those people there are really a wonderful group of people whose lives have unfortunately been touched by cancer. They are able to help in the way they do, not only because they donate their time, but because of the donations people make to all the different organizations. Once I got home a home health nurse came by to check on me and change my dressings. I had 2 drain bulbs or as I liked to call them my "balls" and tubes attached to my side so excess fluid could drain from my system. I had to drain them several times a day and log each time they were drained and how much fluid they contained. When she removed the dressing, I found 25 staples where my breast once was, a very disturbing and depressing sight - no nipple or anything left that even resembled a breast. But I was assured when it gets reconstructed; you will barely even be able to tell I’ve had a mastectomy.

March 8, 2005 - A male doctor is incapable of understanding the female body!

Once again, up at the crack of dawn. I know this time I didn't sleep. Would you sleep if you knew your boob was being cut off? I check into the hospital for a mastectomy on my right breast, thing is I didn't know till I woke up that the doctors were doing a radical mastectomy. A radical mastectomy includes taking the entire breast (nipple included), lymph nodes, and a layer of my chest wall. I woke up in excruciating pain. Demurral did nothing for the pain and I cried for 3 hours straight while they tried to reach my doctor to change meds. Once they switched me to a morphine drip, my pain was finally under control. I felt like I had the crap kicked and stomped out of me. My whole chest was more than tender, my ribs on the side hurt, my back even hurt. I spent 2 days in the hospital in the worst pain of my life. On the 2nd day a student nurse came in and nailed me on the chest with a stethoscope. I just about jumped out of bed screaming. And if that weren't enough, the assistant surgeon came in after and he was just an ass. Before he touched me, I made a comment about being careful because I was in pain, and he said something to the effect of bucking up, getting off the pain meds, and getting out of the hospital because there's no reason for me to be in pain anymore. I looked at my husband and I said I don't know how many breasts this man has had removed from his body, but he has no right telling me how I feel. The next morning, bright and early at 7 am, the same jerk came in and woke me to discharge me. He made it apparent that he wanted me out. I took my sweet ass time getting ready and stayed till noon.

March 3, 2005 - "You have Cancer, here's a tissue"

Today my husband dropped me off at the general surgeon's office for my post-op follow up appt. to get my pathology report. He then went on to take my mom to the airport so she could fly back to Vegas. The report came back positive for cancer, and the margins were not clear, meaning that they did not get it all. The general surgeon recommended an immediate mastectomy be done the following week on 3/8. Here I sat alone in this room while he told me this news. He basically told me I had cancer, handed me a tissue and walked out. I felt like my world came crashing down. As much as I tried to prepare myself for this, I wasn't prepared for that. I had been positive, and hopeful. Sometimes I just wonder what I did to piss God off? I went over to the hospital for pre-op labwork and a chest x-ray. It sank in that I needed my mom to watch Nat next week when I had surgery, I had better call her quick before she gets on that plane. Luckily the airline was very understanding and let her extend her stay at no charge. Also, my general Surgeon did not reveal the true nature of my pathology at this time, in fact it wasn’t until I received copies of my medical records that I learned what type of cancer I had and what the report read: Infiltrating Ductal Carcinoma; Stage 2; T2 N0 M0; Tumor Grade 3; Tumor Size 2 x 2x 1.5 cm; Estrogen Receptor Positive (90%); Progesterone Receptor Positive (5-10%); Her-2/Neu Negative (score of 1+); DNA Ploidy = Diploid; S Phase 2.2%

February 24, 2005 - Nothing like a Cancer scare to ease Menopause worries!

We woke up at the crack of dawn this morning so I could check into the hospital for my hysterectomy and biopsy. To be honest, I'm not really sure if either of us really slept. I've got my bag all packed for a couple days, and we flew my mom up here from Vegas again to stay with Nat and help out afterward. When I woke up after the surgery, I found they had removed the whole lump and some surrounding tissue - approx. 2 cm. For just having a hysterectomy, I was feeling great. I was up and walking laps around the ward so fast my hubby was telling me to slow down! Prior to the surgery I had experienced multiple gynecological problems. My pathology later revealed: Poly-Cystic Ovaries, Cysts, Fibroids, Adhesions, an enlarged Uterus, and Endometriosis. They blame my 4 miscarriages on these problems, but luckily, I did manage to have 1 child 5 yrs. ago - my little miracle. Conception happened all by itself, and I had a smooth pregnancy.

February 14, 2005 - Roses, Chocolates, & a Mammogram?

Here it is, Valentine's Day. Cards, Roses, Chocolates. How romantic! And while I'm daydreaming about a romantic dinner with my hubby, I'm here at the hospital having my boobs smashed, and twisted and turned. Needless to say, a mammogram isn't exactly how I imagined spending this day. After being somewhat tortured, the tech took me to the dreaded ultrasound room where they told me the news that I had lost my baby. She did an ultrasound of the mass to compare with the mammogram images. When I was done, the tech went to get the Radiologist to talk to me. I knew it wasn't going to be good, and I thought, God no, not again, not in this Godforesaken room, not on Valentine's Day. He came in and told me to get dressed, he wanted to show me my mammogram films, and there it was, I saw it as plain as day – just like the pamphlet. He told me that the mass appeared to be cancerous and I needed a biopsy done immediately. I had already scheduled a hysterectomy for 2/24, so now I just needed to add a biopsy on top of that, and find a general surgeon to do it.

February 8, 2005 - Follow that Lump.

Today I went for my post-op follow up appt. with my OB/GYN and I asked her about the lump. I was really hoping she would say it was nothing, but looking back, I'm glad she didn't. Although my family has no known history of cancer of any kind, and given my young age, she thought it would be best to get a mammogram and ultrasound done on the mass - just to be safe.

January 26, 2005 - Happy Lumpy Birthday to Me!

It's my 31st birthday today and I'm approx. 2 weeks into recovery from my D&C. Everything is starting to go back to the way it was. I'm still bleeding from the D&C, and I'm still having raging hormones. But, I have managed to lose the pregnancy weight all except for 4 lbs. And I've even noticed my breasts were going back to normal - All with one exception; there was something hard in my right breast. I thought (hoped was more like it) maybe it might be a bi-product of the pregnancy - like a clogged milk duct. It felt more like a marble than a lump, and I knew in my heart that what I was feeling wasn't okay.

January 13, 2005 - 13 down 352 to go.

Got up at the crack of dawn to check into the hospital for an outpatient D&C. I’ve had this procedure done before, (but not by this doc) so it was no big deal. We had to fly my mom up from Vegas to stay with Natalie while I had the procedure done - we didn't want her at the hospital and Ruben wanted to stay with me the whole time. The hospital here is really nice, private little pre and post surgical rooms. Even though I've had this procedure before, the after effects were way worse this time - I felt like they were never going to end! It pretty much seemed to defeat the whole purpose of a D&C.

January 6, 2005 - Loss 4 and no more.

We went to the hospital today. The 3 of us (me, my husband, and my daughter) sat there in that small dark room while the lady did my ultrasound. I could tell that something was terribly wrong. I couldn't see the baby's heartbeat. The tech went to get the radiologist. After searching for nearly and hour, they concluded what I already knew to be true. My baby's heart had stopped beating. This was my 4th miscarriage. I sat on the table and cried. I really thought this was going to be it. We weren't even trying this time. I don't understand why this always happens to me, why I can't give my husband a son, or why I can't give my daughter a little brother or sister. If I can't understand it at 30, how can I expect a 5 year old to understand it and accept it? Now that we know, we went ahead and made plans for a D&C to be done on the 13th and a full hysterectomy to follow soon after, because if I don't have it removed, I will always want to try and I cannot bear another loss.
You know the saying - somedays you're the pigeon and somedays you're statue. Guess which one I am today?

January 5, 2005 - Home from the Holidays

We just got home the night before last after spending 2 weeks in Vegas for Christmas, it's good to be back, although I can't say I missed the snow! Yesterday was my Daughter Natalie's 5th birthday, and today is my friend Sonia's birthday. Today is my 14 week doctor appointment, I am so excited because I am now officially in my 2nd trimester. My husband and daughter sit in the waiting room while I see the doctor. My doctor can't hear the heartbeat, which didn't surprise me. I thought the baby was just being stubborn. She decided to do an ultrasound and found out there was something wrong with the heartbeat, it was weak, not beating as fast as it should. The doctor ordered an additional ultrasound and sent me to the hospital for it.

December 8, 2004 - The beginning of the end?

I had a full exam at my OB/GYN doctor's office. I was 10 weeks pregnant at the time, the doctor did a breast exam, but reported no abnormalities - but then again, my entire breasts were already hard from the pregnancy.